When did compassion become a dirty word?

When did we become so much more competitive in our workplaces, that we would rather deliver random acts of kindness to strangers than be more understanding and caring for our colleagues, subordinates and managers? In a time of downsizing, redundancies and the end of the age of entitlement, we seem to have become more competitive than ever.

Compassion is not on the list of traits that are traditionally sought in leaders. It is considered weak or passive and yet it takes the greatest amount of strength to build an emotional culture that seeks self-awareness, trust and honesty. In most circumstances, a compassionate person is generally known as vulnerable, someone to be taken advantage of. And yet our strongest leaders and most inspirational people thrived on compassion.

If you want others to be happy, practice compassion, if you want to be happy, practice compassion. Dalai Lama

Yet leadership courses train people to lead with their heads and not with their hearts. Business first, results focused, tough decision maker, eloquent speaker – these are more likely to be the traits admired in leaders. Yet leaders always want to appear in touch with their staff. Some misgivings in the workplace when it comes to compassion:

“The thing that keeps me most up at night is not the work, but the people”. This has become the statement piece (right out of the dummies guide to management) that in reality, is more about moving on difficult people, rather than fostering a workplace culture.

“If I care about one, I have to care about them all”. In large workplaces, it is often easier for the senior executive to be far away from the people that their decisions will affect, so as not to be concerned about the impacts on individuals. The bad decision of one person, can affect the health and wellbeing of so many, had they taken the opportunity to reflect and to care.

There is science-based research that proves the benefits of compassionate and kind workplaces. The health benefits alone and reduction in absenteeism are the immediate affects.

So what are the traits of compassionate leaders: Sincerity, mindfulness, courageous, thoughtful, positive and able to control their moods and feelings. These are definitely ‘tough’ traits.

So how can we engender some of these qualities into our workplace?

• Listen. Don’t listen to respond, listen to understand. Be at personal peace not to respond.

• Take the time to clear your mind. Meditation, in whatever form suits you (whether it is swimming laps, yoga, or quietly sitting on mat) not only calms you, but allows you to rest, reboot and make clearer decisions.

• Be sincere in your dealings. If you commit, then deliver.

• Show gratitude and make an effort to do this regularly.

• Show compassion to yourself

Compassion tends to attract loyalty and committed individuals. This can be done on a micro-level and not necessarily from a top-down approach.

I would recommend for those interested:

http://www.thechangeforum.com/The_Compassionate_Leader.htm

http://knowledge.wharton.upenn.edu/article/fostering-culture-compassion-workplace-matters/

http://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/why_compassion_in_business_makes_sense

#compassionintheworkplace